I feel like I've spent a lot of time talking about the past lately. And how I've over come it all, I hope by now you've gotten the point. I am happy, I am strong, I am me.
I also feel like I've spent a lot of time talking about all the things I want in the future.
But not so much time talking about my life now. I'm not sure why, maybe if you talk about it there's a chance of it going away. But I've decided to talk about me. My life now.
As most of you know I was living with my cousin's T and her husband KC, for the first while. I'm sure they know, after spending an evening with drunk Cathy, how much I appreciate them. They have been the voice of reason(s) is my life for about 3 years now. And I know that any time I need to go home, their door is open....or I have a key. Or I can throw rocks at their bedroom window until they pay attention to me.
But NOW I am no longer sleeping in the bunk beds of their two youngest sons. No longer do I get a wide variety of lovely home baked cookies, and meals. No longer do I have to endure piles of clothes (socks) in front of my door, or KC's belt left in various places in the house.
NOW I have 5 room mates. I found this house of girls and pretty much instantly knew that this is where I need to start. By no means is the house an architectural master piece. I sleep in the basement...not just in the basement. I'd say Alana sleeps in the basement. I sleep in the basement laundry room, right next to the washer and the deep freeze. Well right next as in on the other side of a wall. But I love it. When I'm done, and want to just be me I go to my room shut the door and I'm in my own home.
My room mates are all great girls. We are all very similar. Three of them go to ACAD. My first thought was "Way to waste your money! You don't need to go to school to be and ARTIST." isn't the whole point of art that it is a self expression? Did any of the greats go to art school? Before Picasso cut his ear off did he endure a long art school critique?
But once I got to know them, I realized that most of them had legit careers in mind. Photographer (a girl after my own heart) and Interior Designer.
The other two girls who do not attend ACAD, are great too. At first I was a bit leery about both of them. But I have found ways to grow close to each of them. As close as I can get. I am happy in this house. There isn't any fighting or crazy drama. We are just 6 girls living our lives. And even though I am the only one not in school, it's crazy how we can all still be going through similar things. If anything it is always nice to come home to a chick flick on the TV and a fridge covered with hot, half naked guys.
Secondly, my job. I am incredibly lucky to have snagged this job. And while I don't have that fiery passion that I did a few months into it, I do still love it. I have learned many things. Most importantly I have strengthened parts of me that I didn't know needed help. And since we are on the topic I met a new friend. Sure I'm friends with everyone I work with. But I feel that this guy is a real friend.
We are just gonna call this friend D.
D is the spitting image of Alex (a friend from high school). I think that is why I decided I could trust him. Even though Alex is kind of a jack ass now (it's only because he found out how it felt to have sex. Then he got all crazy about girls THEN he realized he was hot, then throw a bit of alcohol in for good measure... and well it all went down hill from there).
Any ways it's been nice to have a legit friend again. I mean honestly I cut pretty much everyone that wasn't essential from my life. Only those I was 100% sure where not gonna let me down were allowed to stay. I missed the feeling of getting to know who you are with new people. Plus D has a plethora of single attractive friends, so the more I hang around him the better my chances of breaking the single ( and sadly celibate) trend that is currently running a muck in my life.
I was recently taking inventory of all the good things that have happened this year. I got a new car, I have a job that is stable and good paying ( and looks totally pimpin on a resume). I am going to China this year. Oh right news flash B, my cousin in China. He got married to a Chinese movie star. So they wanted his family to come to China and visit. He later called back and said "Oh yeah BTW's fam my favorite cousin aka best friend also needs to come so get her a plane ticket too". I'm sure he did not say it like that, but ever since I found out he married a movie star I hear less of the deeply profound B, and more of the "Yeah that's right who married a FAMOUS person now beeeotch!!" kind of B. FYI that B doesn't exist except in my head.
And since I'm now on this topic, I'd like to list all the things that will never again happen (between B and I) now that he is married.
1) I will never be sitting in the kitchen drinking milk and see him sit down in front of me wear just his garment bottoms with a pair of boxers over them. THANK GOD! but then I will also never see him burn it up the stair in a panic when he hears the door of his Dad's car.
2) I will never again have a conversation about how many wives he will have. Or maybe I should instigate this conversation with his new wife. I think the women needs to know he wants a 7 wife family. And also to have like 75 kids. One girl to another....someone should prepare her for that shit.
and 3) I may never again be having an emotional conversation with my cousin and have him fart extremely loud in the middle of it. I'll also not get to bug him about the only CD he owns (backstreet boys) or about the fact that he has a man purse and a day planner with tulips on it.
Mostly I'm really happy for B. I love him, and I know he needed to get a wife. I'll always miss him and the year we spent together as friends. But we are family, so we are stuck together ... forever.