Have you ever thought "wow this is so not me"?
Maybe it was when you tried on a new shirt, or maybe you were trying a new food.
How about when you spend time with some one? Do you ever think that the person your with does not let you be who you really are?
And it wasn't until this morning that I realized it.
I was asleep, and then I got a text message.
"are you mad at me or are you really that busy that I haven't seen you in weeks. And when I did see you, you acted weird. Did I do something?"
I hate that question. If you did some thing to piss me off, trust me you'll hear about it.
I rolled over and let out huge sigh.
more f---ing drama from my past.
Which through me into pondering, why was it that I had become more notorious the past month.
Then I realized it.
I don't enjoy being with my old friends. They have preconceptions of what I should do, or how I should act. And when I am not the way they expect.....they shun it. The real problem is that 3 months ago I was living my own life, if I wanted to hang out with some one I would. If I didn't I wouldn't. If I wanted to act a certain way I could, if I started being the person I really am it was embraced not ignored.
I learnt how to lead a life with out the people of my past. They apparently did not.
I agreed to give up my time to pretend to be what she wants me to be. But I don't think it will be happening much longer.
This is who I am. Get over your self and open your minds up.