Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Arising From The Ashes

First off I must give a shout out to Tiff. I cant even tell you how grateful I am for all you have done for me.
Second a shout out to the rest of my family. It was truly humbling to hear that you all cared so much. I am eternally grateful to you all as well.
As most of you should know by now, I have had a ruff month. But with A LOT of help from my family, and a bit from my friends (special shout out to Matea for being so great) I have lived through it. And have decided to start a new, In a new town with new people, new lessons and new experiences.
Yesterday I pulled out of everything. First was Classes. As I walked up to the building my stomach did somersaults. What if I was making a terrible mistake was all I could think. I did it, I dropped my classes. And as I walked out of my former school, i felt a weight slide off my back. Next was my job. I once again walked up to the building, the thought crossed my mind that I may be making a terrible mistake again, but after pulling out of classes I felt there was nothing keeping me here anymore. So I talked to my manager. Who took it EXTREMELY well. He wished me good luck, told me not to worry, and said he would give me an excellent reference.
I had already told 2 of my friends that I was leaving.
Cody took it the worse. He blames Will. I dont blame him really, I also blame will. If he would have just left I would have stayed longer. But in the end I still would have left, so I guess blaming does nothing.
But today, today was amazing. As I pack and place my life in boxes, I felt new. Like the girl that I thought I had lost, was really just hiding, tired of what has happened waiting for a spark of hope.
And now that I found that spark I can function. Every thing that was so hard last time I moved feel like a side note. And for once I can picture my life and see something big! not just confusion. Im going to be great. And getting out of here was just what I needed to begin.
Thank you Everyone. For caring and for trying. Things are getting better. And its all thanks to you guys (Especially You Tiff).
So I have arose from the ashes of the past 4 years. ready and willing to see the new life I have blossom in front of my very eyes.

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